Discipleship

I was thinking about what I needed to change in my life so God could use me.

I thought about the things that take up a lot of room in my life. Like, my writing or my ratrod. I wondered about the time spent working on my bike. I even considered the money I spend on all the above. Does God see these as Idols in my life?

These things are a part of who I am. I have actually ruminated over these things because I walked away from a banker job a few years ago to yield my whole life to God. I felt called to be completely available to him. What I found was a joy that I had never known existed.

I would spend my mornings at different coffee shops reading scripture and waiting for God to send someone my way. At night I walked the streets of downtown St. Paul . I prayed for people who were living on the streets and experienced miracles beyond my understanding. Then I found my savings beginning to disappear and fell months behind on my mortgage. I told God “all that I had was his and if he wanted me to lose it all, then so be it”.

My wife was supportive but was beginning to worry about our future. I told God that I really needed some answers and they need to be clear answers. I searched my heart to see if I had been obedient to him. That’s when I realized I had not yielded all to him. I still was clinging to my motorcycle. I kept telling myself that my motorcycle was a tool of the ministry.

One evening as I was walking downtown, Gods message became very clear. “I want you to sell your bike and get caught up on the mortgage”. I couldn't wait to get home I walked in the front door of my house and asked my wife to put the Roadking on Ebay. She was in shock and wanted to make sure she heard me right. Yep, I said. And we need to do it tonight. That was on a Friday night. The next Wednesday a guy called from Kansas and said he wanted to buy it at the “buy it now” price. The next day I watched as my bike rolled out of the driveway. As I stood looking down the street my wife and I looked at each other. Are you OK, she asked? You know, I said, I feel at peace. We walked back into the house and the phone was ringing. I answered the phone and on the other end was a local Children’s Home asking if I would be interested in working for them. I had not even applied at this place. 3 years later I find myself as a supervisor over seeing staff and ministering to hundreds of children. I think its more about being obedient than it is about having and not having. I’m sure some people see my quitting a good job only to go back to work as failure. To that I can only say. I was obedient and it has changed my life.

Since nearly losing it all, God has restored and truly given me my hearts desire.

What I think I have learned from this is:

1) Be who God has made you. Don’t try to be what someone thinks you should be and pray for those who try to change you.

2) Its OK to have things but don’t hold them too tightly.

3) In everything you do, show love.

4) If you’re not sure about something, ask God to help you. He likes showing us how much He loves us.

5) Above all be obedient.

1 John 4:7-8

Bless you Brothers,

-Larry